Monsters Unleashed

Just because a person comes from far away and looks different doesn’t mean he won’t know our ways. So if you’re entrusted with meeting a newly arrived representative from somewhere else, make sure you observe the diplomatic niceties, or first contact might turn out to be as imagined by cartoonist Sveta Shubina:

Another piece of advice: if you’re going to perform an alien autopsy, the first thing to do once you’ve gotten the subject into the laboratory is to make sure it is in fact dead. The consequences of not following this simple procedure are illustrated by cartoonist Andrew Cohen:

And take a tip from Dave Wolfe: never, ever go fishing in the Black Lagoon.

Monsters and creatures of all kinds seem just as clued up about spanking as the human alpha male. Take the super-robot Mazinger Z, originally a Japanese manga creation, but by 1979 the hero of his own Spanish comic book.

In one story he faced Andromeda, a fiendish female super-robot bent on destruction:

But his detachable ‘flying fists’ soon found a way to deal with her:

And the upshot, of course, was a change of heart and the onset of robot love!

So remember, ladies, monsters spank. And don’t assume you’ll be safe just because the species you’ve encountered doesn’t have a lap to put you over or a strong hand to spank you with. Don’t make the same mistake as this spacegirl drawn by fantasy artists Steve Fastner and Rich Larson:

Take care, behave yourself, be a good girl, because, take it from comic-book artist Ben Templesmith:

Even Cthulhu spanks!